Randoms Thoughts

I'm single and I don't want to be, not because I can't be on my own, but because I'm a better me when I have someone in my life. My purpose in life is to help others so I never try to change a man, but instead I help push them to be who they want to be. I like having someone in my life with a goal and an ambition because it allows me to be there from the beginning and help get them to success. It's weird, but I'm empty if I have no one to help. 

Im the kind of person that doesn't need a lot of friends and always has to go out. I need one good friend and a boyfriend to make me happy. I'm content with staying inside playing video games and doing puzzles. I look forward to cuddling and watching movies. It truly doesn't take a lot to make me happy.

In writing this blog I am able to reevaluate and get feedback on my dating habits and patterns that need to change. While in the moment it's hard to say that something isn't right or needs changing. I'll be 25 in November and lets face it my eggs aren't getting any younger lmao. I know I'm an enabler who doesn't always demand what I want/deserve and I have a habit of staying when it's obvious I should leave. I'm working on my bad habits, but the biggest habit I've fixed is making ppl uncomfortable around me. Before I lost 35 lbs (oh yeah go me!!!) I had a way of making people uncomfortable with being around me because I would point out my bigness as a way to keep myself from being hurt if someone else bought it up. Now that I'm happier with myself I no longer do that (instead my weirdness drives ppl away lol). 

As you will see and probably already have seen from previous posts, I tend to attract guys with an issue. It's like my calling card: If you have a mama issue, anger issue, or just Psychotic call me.